In between the rockets, bombs and anti-Semitic diatribes flying through the air, I finally got to read this week's Savage Love column by Dan Savage.
And I laughed. Like Garbo, but without the hat. And cheered. Okay, Michael Renne: tell Klaatu to power down. There just might be hope for humanity after all.
I always did like his geeky-cheeky acerbic humor when he hits his stride. Some of his comments at times will make me not read him for months at a time ...but I always come back. He's cute, too, which helps. I always did have a things for those nerdy pups with a bad boy grin. Unfortunately, he's married. And with a kid, no less. I may be many things, but I'm not a home wrecker, and I'm not keen on getting involved in any open relationships.
So sorry girls, the word is, that the cute ones are gay and married.
Anyhow, after Dan Savage's rapier sharp sarcasm and wit helped shake my dim outlook on the future, I had an epiphany. What humanity needs is its own 12 step program. Last time anyone counted that I know of, there were at least 144 in existence --and that was after Military Brats Anonymous and before Crystal Meth Anonymous. I'm stuck on what to call my new program: Human Kind Anonymous, Homo Sapiens Anonymous, Earthlings Anonymous... with a potential membership of six billion plus, our general service assemblies could be hashing that part out for years to come. Luckily, that's just the formal part. The nuts and bolts are already in place: I'm totally powerless over [human kind / the human race / humanity, etc.] and [human kind / the human race / humanity] are unmanageable.
And today is a beautiful day.
I can hope that I-won't-even-say-his-name-again gets the help he needs, even if at his publicist's and lawyers' prodding. There's enough meetings in this town that I only have a one-in-three-thousand chance of running into him.
And wasn't there a surf festival or something for me to enjoy today, anyway? After pummeling us with all the bad news, the radio did mention that it would be another chamber-of-commerce-perfect day out today, and it looks to be the case from where I sit.
And if you didn't get it, my last post suggesting world annihilation was a joke, okay? So lighten up. And go fly a kite or something. Or read a Dan Savage column or two.